Fuck or Cockshit

i hadn't written a poem in years, until i was on a plane coming back from houston last july, when i cracked some code or something. then i kind of got back in to the swing, at least for a little, and i wrote one on the plane, and a few more that i'm kind of proud of. this is one:






Fuck or Cockshit

We played Megaman in the TV room
Me and this kid, my mom’s friend’s son
Brown hair bowl cut and some Gecko green and blue shirt
Probably khaki shorts

They stopped by on the way to Georgia
Some epic roadtrip, mother son and baby
The kid sat upside down in the backseat of the sedan
Loaded with pillows and board games
Wierdo.

He asked, in between levels, if I could, was allowed to say bad words
Some 8 year-old rite of passage
Saying fuck or cockshit
Like the old man
Or grandfather
Or alcoholic uncle

I was young as him with a tongue as untouched
Not with soap, but with a more natural cleanser:
fear
& yet, getting the better of me, was
The bravado of youth
I said yeah to impress. Yeah, to impress.

& My mother blew my cover.

the Beirut that's not destroyed

So I'll be 21 in a week or so, a little over. the 9th.

Check it: Beyonce was 16 when she signed to Columbia records with Destiny's Child. Patrick Wolf was 20 or so when he released Lycanthropy. Willy Mason's only 19 and he's been touring solid for at least two years and is signed to Team Love. Conor Oberst was touring (and drinking, yuck yuck)consistently when he was, what, 14? (no shit commander venus sucked but i give the dude credit for even thinking it was possible at that tender age). And the dude from Beirut, Zach Condon, is 20 now and in addition to having next big thing written all over his boyish face, the drummer from Neutral Milk Hotel plays in his band. I mean, that's pretty rad.

If you've crumbled into a small pile of depression, well I don't know what will help you. But it's interesting to note how youth is so prized in music these days. i feel like i read something about that a while ago, but it's not really important. i mean, it's obvious. i feel the pressure all the time. for some reason i feel like once you hit 30, you're done. check out. peace. done & done.

but i like to think I'm pretty happy where i am, going to college and cutting my teeth bullshitting around a tight, relatively noninclusive music scene. i've developed a ton as a songwriter, singer, musician, etc. i probably could've done that had i just bought a van out of high school and hit it, but that would've been entering a world of pain. i dunno man, i sucked when i was a kid. i sucked probably up till last summer, '05. and even then i just got by. i did not have the chops nor the mental or emotional capacity to cut out on my own just then, and if i didn't die, i probably would've given up music or killed myself or gone crazy or something. i can do tht after i blow my parents' $$.

like this condon character. spend all or most of highschool amassing a large army of instruments. spend as much time playing and recording those instruments. after highschool, move out of sante fe, new mexico and hitchhike/ramble/dick around europe with gypsies/vagabonds/etc. learn their ways. come back to states after relatively short trip and put all things learned to good use. croon. etc. tour with get him eat him and sell out a bunch of shows. develop defense against those who might say you are not unlike a diet patrick wolf.

anyway, beirut's pretty good. i wonder how he feels now that his band's namesake is mostly a smoking pile of rubble.

-cd

Christening

so what better way to christen a newly born blog, not unlike a rosy infant in its mother's arms, then to write about what a great night last night was. there were these two parties going on simultaneously-- one a birthday party on windom street, the second an '80s themed debauch-fest over on yuma. the back doors of the two houses were on the same alleyway, so one could, if one wished, walk with little effort from the backyard of windom over to yuma. needless to say, i wished.

boy! it was like we ran the block. nothing else mattered. just a ton of kids running around, being useless and destructive. i'd hang out at windom, talk to dustin about bourbon and the South, drink some, walk over to yuma, dance and let my hair down, you know. and then rinse and repeat! it was great. never stayed in one place too long, gotta keep on your toes.

so school starts tomorrow and i couldn't be more, well, excited? happy? i don't know, really. pumped. i'm definitely pumped. summer really takes it out of you, boy. everyone seems so full of life now! the dudes next door keep whooping it up, hollerin and carryin on, and i can't find it in my heart to tell them to keep it down. it's a beautiful thing.

that's a theme for the semester. even with the knowledge that things'll cool off and lull, one must remember these times of great promise, and know that nothing's too far away from it. things will cool off. but right now the heat is on! yeah!

-chris dewitt